The religiouses of Scotland really are dead set against gays marriage. They don’t want it. Really don’t want it. Won’t even have it in the house.
And so they have decided (you know them, ideas just keep popping into their heads!) to put some hard cash into it. You know, the sort of cash that could have gone into helping the poor or doing some good, that cash. Even dolly old Cardinal Keith O’Brien here, who likes colour and movement and robes that have a bit of swish in them GODDAMMIT!, has given his support to the idea backed by such unblemished organisations as the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of Scotland, the Christian Institute, the Evangelical Alliance and Destiny Churches, to put leaflets into every house, flat and tenement slum in all of Scotland to let people know that they are against marriage. Which we think most people actually had a handle on by now.
But fair’s fair, it’s only the same money that they put into their campaigns against sex before marriage, adultery, divorce and child sexual abuse carried out by members of the Church. Oh, they didn’t put money into those things? Oh! Our mistake.
Those Scottish religiouses really don't want the gays to marry and they're putting their money where their dirty mouths are,