If someone had taken the time and trouble to explain to us just how serious gay people getting equality in the field of marriage was, we never would have supported it.
For a start, it turns out that if gay people are allowed to get married (not just civil partnershipped but actually married like real people) then unborn children are put at risk. Look! It says it right there! Straight women are apparently going to be miscarrying all over the place the minute – the actual minute! – the law is passed allowing gays to say ‘I do!’ We didn’t realise that. Did you?
Not only that, but as soon as gays are allowed to marry, the wedding photographs of straight people will immediately self-combust, being torn into at least four equal parts as illustrated in this handy leaflet.
Now you know that, are you still supporting gay marriage? No, thought not.
PS ‘Turn over for more information’? That’s a bit saucy, isn’t it?
We didn't realise gay marriage was putting so much at risk!,