Three out of four of these poor little crucified Christians have been told to sling their (in some cases) homophobic hooks


Eat us, one and all

Nadia Eweida, the lady on the left has just won a case at the European Court. Her employers, British Airways, asked her to remove her bling. But Nadia, a Christian with deeply brainwashed-in beliefs, was having none of it. She wants that cross right there in your face because it is a part of her Christian identity. It’s not required for her to wear her cross but she just wants to. OK? Deal with it. And if she wants to wear a nun’s wimple you can just deal with that as well.

When British Airways, who do have some control over what their staff wear (it’s called ‘a uniform’) asked her to pop it under her blouse like a good girl because, let’s face it, no one wants to see cheap Ratners trinketry like that bobbing in their dinner tray when they’re trying to watch a rom-com starring maybe Cameron Diaz on their way to Miami, she refused. No, she said, stamping stumpy ankled trotters (well, it’s the flying, isn’t it?) The Lord baby Jesus, who let’s not forget died for our sins (even though we weren’t born then), wanted it. Just as he wants Nadia for a sunbeam.

The European Court, however, has upheld her right to display her closely held beliefs – maybe in part because a bit of sparkle might take the eyes away from that unsightly neck area – which is why we are now asking gay stewards (apparently there are some) to wear pink triangle badges denoting their homosexuality to work and see what happens.

In the remaining cases, the poor victimised Christians (honey, it’s a religion based on a victim complex – why else would you wear an instrument of torture as your symbol?) have been told to do one. Lillian Ladele, second in, the woman whose Christian beliefs don’t inhibit her having sex before marriage (she has a son, is single) but do prevent her from performing civil partnerships, was told she had no case. Shirley Chaplin, a nurse who wanted to drag her cross through open wounds, was told she had no case. And Gary MacFarlane, who felt as a Christian he couldn’t give relationship advice to gay men (even though he was being paid to *checks notes* give relationship advice) was told he had no case.

Now you dirty Christians, can we just leave it there or are we taking this to a higher authority? Or should that be a Higher Authority?

 

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