The Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill is currently being debated in the House of Lords – in between humble nibbles of chocolate-covered croissants – where a decision as to whether gay people deserve the same rights as every other goddamn motherfucker in the country will be decided by a bunch of unelected rich people mostly in the crème brûlée of their lives.
Many of the 93 peers who have signed on the dotted to go and debate the bill at Her Majesty’s HOL are nice and sane – like Baroness Mallalieu, Lord Browne of Madingley, Baroness Morgan of Ely, Baroness Neuberger, Lord Young of Norwood Green, Lord Black of Brentwood and Baroness Gould of Potternewton. Pop ’em on your Christmas card list.
Many, however, are what is known in the business as bigoted cunts. These are they below, with handy cut-out byline pics should you wish to stand outside the House of Lords and rip them new arseholes. We’re not condoning violence, of course. Just verbal abuse. After all, language was only invented so that unattractive homophobes could be commented on.
Baroness Knight (this trout was on FIRE!)
– ‘A higher authority has already decided people are not equal’ because ‘some people can see, others are blind.’
– ‘This bill is either trying to pretend I can change men into women, or vice versa.’
– ‘Marriage is not about just love. It is about a man and a woman, themselves created to produce children, producing children.’
– ‘A man can no more bear a child than a woman can produce sperm, and no law on earth can change that.’
– ‘Of course homosexuals are delightful people, very artistic.’
Lord Singh of Wimbledon, with bonnet.
Equal marriage ‘seeks to destroy’ the institution of marriage.
Lord Tebbit. Oh, just these same old chestnuts.
The purpose of marriage is ‘procreation’. Tell that to Charles and Camilla. Oh, and that his ‘obligation’ to respect gay people is being severely challenged by equal marriage. Touchy little turd, isn’t he?
Lord Carey. Natch.
Lord Framlingham (Stuart Hall, much?)
The fact that the HOL is ‘even considering’ equal marriage shows how much Britain has ‘lost its moral compass’. And we all know what Lord Framlingham can do with his moral compass.
Marquess of Lothian
‘We must only promote real families, not pretend ones.’ Honey, we’re not dealing with Play-Doh.
Lord Stoddart (round of drinks if you can find a pulse)