Equal marriage is a sign of the apocalypse, says the man with a doily on his head.


Equal marriage is a sign of the apocalypse, says the man with a doily on his head.

‘This (equal marriage) is a very dangerous and apocalyptic symptom,’ said Patriarch Kirill of Moscow, head dolly of the Russian Orthodox Church, during an address in Red Square’s Kazan Cathedral yesterday. At that precise moment in time we were riding high on Champari (champagne and Campari. It’s the future, at least for now) and homosexuals in shorty-shorts. Guess who has having more fun.

‘It means that people are on the path of self-destruction,’ he added, while fingering the finest beads stupid people’s money can buy.

Segue: We bet Madeleine McCann’s in that beard.

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