1. Ant ‘n’ Dec. Really? Can we get the fuck over these two charmless, phoney Morecambe and Wise wannabes? It’s pathetic. But at least the M&W wannabe thing was aired by the celebs on the video for their Legend award. Or whatever it was.
2. Love Julie Howeveryouspellit, who plays Hayley in Corrie, but she needed to bring it down a couple of notches.
3. Doctor Who? Drama? We haven’t seen so much unsightly ham since Miss Piggy twerked in a g-string.
4. How highly hilarious is Benedict Cumberbatch with that board-short skit! You kids. You’re going to ruin this underwear if you carry on like that. *rolls eyes*
5. Nigel Harman’s portrayal of Simon Cowell in the largely unfunny excerpt from I Can’t Sing, the Harry Hill/X Factor musical, was strangely camp. Much camper than Simon Cowell in real life, surely.
6. How pointless/patronising was the bringing the ‘ordinary’ woman out of the audience to announce the Soap Award? But how nice was Corrie’s Roy for not completely blanking her?
7. Sam Bailey. Wrong song.
8. Do you think Ant ‘n’ Dec didn’t turn up until later so they could get the award they DIDN’T win out of the way?
9. Doctor Who? We still can’t get over the fact that it beat Broadchurch. Kids, eh?
10. Bet Ricky Gervais wished he hadn’t broken his lifetime boycott.
Ten things about last night's National Television Awards,