We don’t even pretend to know what goes on with straight people on dates (and in most cases don’t want to have to think about it) but one thing we do know from our religious watching of the TellyVee is that women seem not to expect to pay for their own food. Even if they have no intention of putting out. Like ever!
Take this one here with all the make-up that… not MAC but BHS SkinCare For You can make and someone else’s hair. When the bill came at the end of the meal – £70 – and her date, who looked like her son in an Alan Bennett wind-cheater, said, ‘So, that’ll be £35 each…’ and proceeded to get his wallet out, she right went into one.
Those lips pursed up (and you can tell they’ve done a lot of pursing in their time), the huff descended and she told us all in voiceover that she had never NEVER been expected to pay for a dinner. And she still wondered why several people had divorced her.
In the after-bit, where they get asked if they would like to see each other again, Mr. Date was all, ‘Well, I wouldn’t mind. I think we had a nice evening…’ while she was immediately, ‘I thought it was terrible that you expected me to pay for my food…’ At which he slapped her and told her to fuck right off. Or would have done had he been us.
But, nasty nan aside, we have noticed in First Dates that the ladies always do a little feeble protesting and then allow themselves to be paid for even if they are about to go into the after-bit room and read him the riot act about how she would never lower herself to be seen in public with him again. And some of these ladies reckon they go on multiple dates a week!
So, in conclusion (and said in a voice not unlike Carrie in Sex and the City), we pondering homosexuals are wondering, are dates just a way straight women have of getting to eat for free? And why is this considered OK in *checks calendar* the 21st century?