partying potato

You are browsing the search results for "partying potato"

The partying potato has a new husband (well, soon...) and she's never looked lumpier. Sorry, lovelier.

The partying potato has a new husband (well, soon…) and she’s never looked lumpier. Sorry, lovelier.

Here she is. The useless, talentless, lumpen bag of (too much skin) that is Scientologist Honeymonster Peaches Geldof with the man who will, no doubt, soon be her new husband. God help the poor bastard. Chucking Peaches under one of her wide selection of chins is one Thomas Cohen, who, judging by the other photos […]

Just when you thought London Fashion Week couldn't get any tackier, what with the Partying Potato Geldofs and all, this skank turns up!

Just when you thought London Fashion Week couldn’t get any tackier, what with the Partying Potato Geldofs and all, this skank turns up!

Rocking an Ultra Nate hairstyle (very, erm, now), some shoes from Shoe Express, those glasses people with cataracts wear, a plastic Africaaaa pendant (again, very now) and some dead things round her shoulders – even though temperatures in London that day were hovering in the late 70s – is this piece. Her name is Amber […]

The Partying Potato (TM) gets her own TV show. Advising teenagers. Exactly.

Peaches Geldof, who has been given everything yet given nothing, has landed her own telly show which is being touted as ‘Jeremy Kyle for teenagers’. Jeremy Kyle, for those who don’t know, is basically Ricki Lake. Yet utterly detestable. *penny drops* The show will be on ITV. *penny keeps on droppin’* ‘We are going to test […]

The partying potato finds a whole new location where she's not welcome!

The partying potato finds a whole new location where she’s not welcome!

Not content with boring the bollocks off London and New York, Peaches Geldof off-of Bob ‘give us yer money’, ‘no, you give us yours’ Geldof has landed in Cannes. And no one knows why. Is she an actress? No. Is she a journalist? No. Does she work in film production? No. Is she an international […]

We know that by covering this story we are just encouraging more coverage of the Partying Potato™ that is Peaches Geldof, but we felt the world needed to see the camel toe that is her most-probably-never-even-had-a-hymen bucket fanny…

We know that by covering this story we are just encouraging more coverage of the Partying Potato™ that is Peaches Geldof, but we felt the world needed to see the camel toe that is her most-probably-never-even-had-a-hymen bucket fanny…

*pauses, pukes, wipes mouth, pukes again, gets post-puke euphoria, dances around a bit, catches sight of cloven-hoofed Geldof parts again, pukes once more for luck, leaves the room*

The partying potato's marriage is over. All eyebrows fail to rise. And they still say gays getting hitched discredits the institution of marriage.

The partying potato’s marriage is over. All eyebrows fail to rise. And they still say gays getting hitched discredits the institution of marriage.

Potato Geldof (she certainly got her father’s looks!) and her poor deluded sucker of a husband have announced – to the utter shock of the world! – that their marriage is over. ‘After much soul-searching,’ (soul? Potato? Surely some mistake) ‘we have made the mutual decision to end our marriage and have agreed to go […]

The Partying Potato hits New York.

The Partying Potato hits New York.

What’s the pointless spawn of a one hit wonder – seen here circled in our Heat-style-y circle of shame – to do when her native country has run out of free flying objects to lob at that petulant, straight-out-of-a-Seth-MacFarlane-cartoon face? Why, run off to the land of the free-if-you-have-enough-money, the US and A, that’s what! Hooray! And that, ladies and […]

Any show with 'OMG!' in the title needs a swift kick up the cunt. As does the presenter of said show.          (AKA 'When will the lambs stop screaming? Part 3')

Any show with ‘OMG!’ in the title needs a swift kick up the cunt. As does the presenter of said show. (AKA ‘When will the lambs stop screaming? Part 3’)

We’ll give you half a guess as to who the presenter of ‘OMG! Totally Peaches’ is. RiiiiiGHT?! And we’ll give you one third of a guess as to which TV channel is churning out said bollocky bollocks. (ITV2. To be fair you could have been wasting your time with Channel 5 or CBS Drama or […]