You’ve got to hand it to Pastor Charles L. Worley (no doubt a hot favourite with the One Million Cunty Moms): he has imagination. In reaction to President Obama saying he thought gay marriage was OK but wasn’t actually going to do anything about getting it through or anything, a lightbulb just popped on in Pastor Worley’s head. He just can’t stop having ideas, that one.
‘I had a way… I figured a way out – a way to get rid of all the lesbians and queers – but I couldn’t get it past the Congress,’ he said. Oh, don’t give up so soon.
‘Build a great big, large fence – 50 or a 100 miles long – and put all the lesbians in there. Fly over and drop some food. Do the same thing with the queers and the homosexuals – and have that fence electrified so they can’t get out. Feed ‘em. And you know in a few years, they’ll die out. You know why? They can’t reproduce.’
Just one thing wrong with your theory, Pastor Worley, sir: most gays and lesbians AND queers come from straight AND heterosexual parents. They don’t actually breed man on woman. Which is kind of the point of being a gay or lesbian or queer. Which means the compounds of which you speak are actually going to be hot-beds of homosexual and lesbian and queer sex. A bit like Mykonos.
We’ll book a couple of weeks right here on the spot, especially if they’re going to drop in food so we don’t have to pay those ridiculous Mykonos prices.
And some other people gave it some stars! This is what we’re up against, gays. Now, imagine if that had been said about a racial or religious group. It would surely be a matter for the police.
And not because they’re stretching that T-shirt all out of shape either.
No, the One Million Moms movement in America (we demand a recount, by the way, not that there’s any shortage of cunts in the world) has objected to this poster by the GAP and they are not going to buy any more unflattering chinos there until it is withdrawn.
They are extending their boycotting activities (not that they are a particularly active group, physically) to GAP-related brands Old Navy, Banana Republic etc and have stated that these brands ‘does not deserve, nor will it get, money from conservative families across the country’. A little more time on the grammar homework might not go amiss, ladies.
‘Supporting GAP is not an option until they decide to remain neutral in the culture war,’ they go on (and on: well, you know what mums are like when they get a bee in their bonnet). ‘GAP needs to seriously consider how their immoral advertising affect the youth of our nation.’
Yeah, two boys in a t-shirt is clearly the work of the devil, a culture war for a group who have no culture that’s not Dr. Phil. Listen, ‘moms’, we suggest you go back to the job of feeding your children foods that will make them fat but mean you don’t have to actually cook and have more time for TV and moaning about your poor bastard husbands.
Oh, and remember, any dog in the street can be a mother, so if you ever need any help getting down off that very high horse…
She’ll turn up at the Oscars without so much as a lick of tinted moisturiser but when it comes to Candy, the transversal style magazine, she’ll go the extra mile. Well, them ladies is no slouches when it comes to the maquillage, and that’s for reals.
2) Like Bill Roache off-of Ken Barlow, his hair is a miracle. It’s like he has money.
3) His bendy Virgin trains may have base notes of urine, middle notes of burning rubber and top notes of lavender, but Virgin Airlines are the nicest of the lot, going from us to the States. And back again. We add the latter because we do love a bit of Singapore Airlines. Who tend to go the other way.
4) He employs attractive people at Virgin Airlines. Some of them are even gay.
e) Despite the money, he insists on wearing a leather jacket that looks like it was bought from a pleather outlet factory in Cheatham Hill, Manchester.
6) The music on this video is like something out of a Merchant Ivory. If our hearts weren’t made of stone, we’d be crying like girls right now. Sorry, gays.
7) We know Richard Branson had nothing to do with music, we just needed to share.
8) His Virgin Clubhouse is the best of the lot. Except when we’re in the Singapore Airlines lounge.
Lantern-jawed, multi-untalented singer-with-a-lisp Will Young is to star in a version of the genius musical Cabaret. And not as the gorilla either.
Yes, theatre-lovers, Will Young, winner of competitions, rudest man in all of pop, is to star as the Emcee in a ‘re-imagining’ of the classic musical. It is a role that was made legendary by Joel Grey in the movie, a role that has only really been successfully managed by Alan Cumming since then.
Said Will, ‘I have spent the last ten years singing and dancing and acting…’ We will be the judge of that.
Up to play Sally Bowles opposite Will in the musical that will tour the fleapits of the UK before settling in the West End just in time for the general exodus related to the Olympic Games are the likes of Su Pollard, Pat from EastEnders and Bagpuss.
