Here it is in its cut ‘n’ paste entirety. It’s like bloody Time Team round ‘ere…
Self-confessed ‘gobby cow’ and all-round good girl, Adele (no need for a surname, in manner of Madonna and Jordan and Boris Johnson aka ‘Cunt’) sat down with us for a bit of a q and a sesh. And don’t worry, she answered your quizzlesticks properly – she’s not bovvered by anyfing, innit?
How are they coping with you not being a size zero in America? We all know what they’re like… Bernard
Not at all actually. I think that the whole world is obsessed with what you look like because of Hollywood, but three quarters of America are overweight. I ain’t got time to go to the gym. I don’t want to eat a salad without Caesar sauce. I was reading that thing about Fern Britton. I mean I love Fern Britton, she’s my favourite. I don’t know whether it’s true or not but I read all these headlines about ‘I’d rather be big and happy rather than having to try and lose weight all the time’, but no, they haven’t. Most journalists in the US are, unless you’re doing something serious, real girls or real gays so they just love you anyway, it doesn’t matter what you look like. They’re really fun.